Erwin

Coupled with surprises, there are a few things in this world that I despise. Besides the aforementioned Surprise element which I am totally not onboard,  I am also inundated with the ongoing disappointment factor from friends and people who say one thing and do another, the fact that the spoken word means nothing and yet i i believe them at their word even when there is nothing on record or in the past that show i should believe or trust one thing that is said. I try to be compassionate and sensitive to others issues and downfalls and even family tragedies but to use and abuse friendships and not be honest when the opportunities are ever present, not Cool at all!

I understand Erwin is in a tough spot, even before his girls illness he was always in a tough spot, working his ass off 2 jobs and still not making ends meet, much of this by his poor choices in spending  but the choice of the bad mate that he has children with are his biggest downfall. Being torn down and beaten up over and over again , even cheating on him with the godfather of their child still he stands by her side, for what. she's not in a class of his in intelligence , not a great looking gal and maybe, just maybe she can suck and fuck like a Tijuana whore and whoop the fuck Dee. Why , ? Why? why? does he continue to chase this tired tail and in the process derail his support group and give in the the love that he thinks he has when in fact he doesn't love himself??? I give up but yet he goes back for more diappointment when in fact he knows no other way, from childhood he was doomed and has yet to give professional help a real shot

I hate to bag on Erwin and Scarlett but my friendship and my kindness and compassion and empathetic ways have been abused for the 3rd time now. This in fact is a mirror image of what Scarlett has done to him and yet i speak almost hypocritically of his choice to take here back. well why do i put myself in a position to keep giving to him and allowing him to owe me money for things bought that he doesn't need, having 6 kids there are sacrifices we must make, his toys aren't one of them and i help to finance some of them. Shame on me for helping a friend and shame on me for expecting his word to mean anything. checking my paypal account again for the 7th straight day after i was told there was money sent there , Nothing, nothing at  all in my account and a friendship that is void of any truth Or meaning. Pisses me off to think that i considered him a real friend at one time, he will pay me i know,but a one year loan is going on 2 plus now and I'm tired off waiting, i have expenses as he does but I didn't borrow from him, he borrowed from me and i f i were a Bank I'd repo the things i sold to him. live and learn and give and be taken advantage of, no more for me , only thing he did was lose a great Friend and make it harder for me to give to the next guy based on my experience with him. Too bad, so fucking sad!